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About Osaka

But nah, it ain’t all laughs. Last week, got mugged tryin to score—some git nicked me wallet while I’m hagglin with this bird. Pissed me right off! “We shall fight on the beaches,” I mutter, shakin me fist, but she just scarpered, leavin me skint. Surprised me how quick she bolted—faster’n Churchill runnin from a taxman! Reckon she’d fit right in that film, all mysterious, vanishin into the fog like Maggie Cheung in her cheongsam.

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After that, I needed a breather. So, I hit up the park near the river. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. It was beautiful, man. I sat there, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this group of tourists starts taking selfies. Like, chill! I’m trying to enjoy nature here! But whatever, I guess they’re just excited.