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About Saitama

So, check this—back in the day, like, old Vegas stories, they say prostitutes used to hang by the gas stations, waitin’ for truckers, flashin’ smiles like they’re auditionin’ for somethin’. Little known fact: some’d carry switchblades in their boots—badass, right? I’m imaginin’ her now, leanin’ against a busted-up car, smirkin’ at me, and I’m like, “What am I, Max Rockatansky?”—all sweaty and neurotic, yellin’ in my head, “I just wanna talk, lady!” She’s prob’ly thinkin’, “This guy’s a schmuck,” and I’m over here, heart racin’, palms sweaty—pathetic!

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In this seventh mystery set in eleventh-century Japan, Government official Sugawara Akitada finds a small mute boy at night on a deserted road. Akitada, still.

Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I look down, and some dude just knocked over a whole picnic table! Like, how do you even do that? He’s trying to pick it up, but it’s like watching a baby deer learn to walk. I’m dying laughing up in my tree.

San Francisco set to pay out $9M for cycling crash at infamous street bump