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About Saitama

Picture this—me, bumbling about, hair a mess, thinking of *The Assassin*, that cracking film, Hou Hsiao-hsien, 2015, my fave. There’s this bit, right, “To kill or not to kill,” all moody and tense. Finding a prostitute? Bit like that—dodgy choices, murky vibes. I reckon it’s a right pickle, a *conundrum maximum*! Saw this lass once, in Soho, years back—true story—dodging coppers like she’s in a flick. Made me chuckle, but blimey, the risks! You don’t wanna end up in the clink, do you?

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kamezaki Street. Gotta grab my morning coffee, ya know? I’m standing there, half-asleep, and this lady in front of me is takin’ FOREVER. Like, c’mon, lady, it’s just a rice ball! I’m about to lose it. Finally, she pays, and I’m like, “YES! My turn!” But then, I realize I forgot my wallet. Ugh! Classic me, right?

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