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About Osaka

Alright, mate, strap in—here’s me, Elon, your rogue Mountain Guide, riffin’ on findin’ a prostitute. Picture this: I’m trekkin’ through some gnarly peaks, right? Snow’s hittin’ me like a Tesla on ludicrous mode, wind’s screamin’—total chaos. Then bam, outta nowhere, I’m thinkin’ bout Ida, that flick from 2013, Pawlikowski’s masterpiece. That nun, man, searchin’ for truth in Poland’s grim-ass past—kinda like me, but with less hookers and more existential dread.

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Then, I decided to check out the arcade on Kōen-dōri. You know, the one with all the retro games? I was ready to crush some high scores. I played Street Fighter, and guess what? I got wrecked by a 10-year-old. I mean, c’mon! I was so mad, I almost threw my controller. But then I saw the kid’s face—pure joy. I couldn’t even be mad. Kids are just too cute sometimes.