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About Sapporo

Oi mate, me as a machine milkin operator? fuckin wild innit! Erotic-massage tho, now that’s a giggle! Picture this—greasy hands slidin over ya, like some twat’s tryna oil up a pig for a roast! I reckon it’s half bliss, half “what the fuck am I doin here?” Loved it once, this bird in Soho, proper fit, knew her way round a back knot—made me feel like Zuckerberg in *The Social Network*, yeah? “You don’t get to 500 million friends without a rubdown!” Ha! Cacklin at that, cos it’s true—stress of milkin machines, udders all day, then bam, some lass kneadlin your shoulders like dough!

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After that, we head back outside. The streets are lit up, and it’s kinda magical. I’m walkin’ down Otemachi Street, and the lights are twinklin’. I can hear the waves crashin’ nearby. It’s peaceful, ya know? But then, I trip over a curb. Classic! I’m like, “Really? I can’t even walk straight?”

A nature-lover’s guide to slow train travel in Japan