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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, boozy, “I drink and I know things.” So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, eh? Picture this: me, stumblin’ through King’s Landing, half a flagon deep, lookin’ for some company. Reminds me o’ that flick *Shame*—y’know, my fave, Steve McQueen’s 2011 gem. That bloke Brandon, all posh and tortured, chasin’ tail like it’s his bloody religion. “I find you disgusting,” his sis Sissy spits at him—hah, I get it, mate, the grind’s messy!

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I can’t help but smile. I mean, who doesn’t love flowers? But then, she gets a call. It’s her boss. She answers, and I swear, I can hear the dude yelling through the phone. She hangs up, slams her drink, and storms out. I’m just standing there, like, “Wow, that escalated quickly.”

Easy Japanese news in translation: Giant rope made to decorate Yamagata Pref. tree