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About Kobe

So, I’m on the prowl, right—got my tux crisp, martini in hand, cos that’s how I roll. Findin’ a prossie ain’t just a quick shag, nah, it’s a bloody art. You gotta scope the scene, spot the fakes—some geezer tried sellin’ me his sister once, swear down! Made me proper mad, that did—cheeky sod. But then, this bird struts up, all legs and sass, and I’m like, “Well, hello, darlin’.” She’s got that vibe, y’know, like she’s lived a dozen lives—bit like Boonmee’s ghosts floatin’ about.

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But then, I’m walkin’ by the river, and I see this dude throwin’ trash in the water. I’m like, “What the heck, man?!” I lose it. I’m shoutin’, “Hey! Pick that up!” He just looks at me like I’m crazy. I mean, c’mon! Gotsucho’s got some beautiful rivers, and you wanna pollute it? Ugh!