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Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, yeah, the wizard, authoritative as hell—YOU SHALL NOT PASS!—and I’ve got thoughts on findin’ a prostitute, right? Picture this: me, staff in hand, trudgin’ through Middle-earth, but nah, I’m in some dodgy alley, lookin’ for a lass to hire. Why? Cos sometimes even wizards need a break, innit? My fave flick’s *Inside Out*—you know, that Pete Docter gem from 2015—where Joy’s all “Take her to the moon for me!” and Sadness is draggin’ her feet. That’s me, searchin’ for a prossie, emotions all over the shop.

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So, I’m signing away, trying to keep the energy up. But then, this one guy, Mr. Tanaka, starts going off about how the city’s not doing enough. He’s all, “We need more funding!” And I’m like, “Dude, chill.” But I get it. It’s frustrating. I felt my blood boiling a bit. Like, can we just get some positive vibes here?

Enjoy the end of summer and the beginning of autumn! 10 Recommended Events in Hokkaido [September 2024].