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Lemme tell ya, I’ve seen some sh*t. Back in the day—well, not *my* day, I’m timeless, ha!—sex-dating was hush-hush. Little known fact: in the ‘90s, people used *newspapers* for this! Classified ads, all sneaky, “Man seeks woman for fun times.” Wild, right? Now it’s all DMs and nudes—progress, I guess? Makes me laugh, tho, how we’ve gone from ink to “u up?” texts at 2 a.m.

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After that, I hit up a café on Chatan’s backstreets. The coffee was strong, like, “I’m gonna make you jittery” strong. I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ to chill, when this lady starts talkin’ to me about her garden. She’s all, “You gotta try this new fertilizer!” I’m like, “Lady, I’m an agronomist, I know my stuff.” But she’s so passionate, I can’t help but smile.

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