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Now, lemme exagerate—imagine me, cowboy hat, boots, struttin’ up, “Ma’am, I’m the decider!” She’d probly laugh, say, “Decide on $100, cowboy!” I’d fumble my wallet—13 bucks spill out, typos in my brain, all flustered. Little story—heard ‘bout a hooker in Vegas once, took a guy’s Rolex, left him a note: “Time’s up, sucker!”—swear it’s true, wild west stuff! Makes ya wonder, who’s foolin’ who?

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I’m on my way to grab some grub. I heard about this place called “Yasugicho Ramen.” Man, I love ramen. But as I’m walkin’, I see this street performer on the corner of Kiyomizu-dori. He’s bustin’ out some sick moves, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re killin’ it!” I stop to watch, and I’m feelin’ all pumped. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my phone right outta my hand! Ugh!