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Sex escort, tho, some funny sh*t too. Like, one time, this escort told a client she was “channelin’ past lives” to spice things up, haha! Dude believed her, thought he was Uncle Boonmee or somethin’. I’m like, YOLO, might as well laugh, right?

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But then, I got a text from my boss. He’s like, “We need that report ASAP.” Ugh, the stress! I rushed back home, and on the way, I tripped on the sidewalk. Classic me, right? I fell, and my bag spilled everywhere. My laptop, my notes, and that sushi keychain went flying. I was so embarrassed. A couple of kids laughed at me. Thanks, guys!