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About Fukuoka

What surprised me? How many dudes use this—like, bankers, lawyers, even my dumb cousin Kyle prob’ly! I’m laughin’ my ass off thinkin’ ‘bout him payin’ for it, that Jew bastard. But real talk, it’s handy—pick a girl, meet up, done. No bullshit datin’ apps. Tho, one time, cop almost caught me—heart poundin’, “The sea is calm!”—and I ran like a fat ninja. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but who cares!

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First off, I hit up Nakabirose Street for some coffee. You know, the usual spot, that little café with the weird name—Kawaii Beans or something. I swear, they have the best lattes. But today? Ugh, they messed up my order. I asked for a caramel macchiato, and they gave me a plain black coffee. Like, what am I, a robot? I was so mad. I mean, who drinks black coffee for fun?