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So, erotic-massage—posh wank or proper treat? I reckon it’s both, depending who’s kneading ya. Started centuries back, right? Ancient Greeks, dirty sods, slathering oil on blokes—called it “sensual healing.” Bollocks! More like a sneaky grope with a fancy name. Got me proper chuffed digging that up—history’s filthier than a Soho alley!

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Then I decide to stroll down to the Uozu Aquarium. I’m pumped! I love aquariums. Fish are cool, right? But when I get there, the line is wrapped around the block. I’m talking like, a million people. I’m standing there, getting angrier by the second. Like, c’mon, it’s just fish! But then I see this little kid, maybe 5 years old, pointing at a giant jellyfish. His face lights up, and I can’t help but smile. Kids, man. They make everything better.

Godzilla: Final Wars (2004) ⭐ 6.3 | Action, Adventure, Fantasy