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Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—findin a prostitute ain’t no picnic! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know, my fave flick—Wes Anderson’s a genius—and I’m like, damn, Sam and Suzy ran off into the woods, all innocent and wild, but this? This is a whole diff game, darlin! Findin a prossie—shit, it’s like huntin for a rare bird in a storm. You gotta know where to look, who to ask, and not get pissed when some creep tries rippin ya off.

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When I get there, it’s chaos. People everywhere, and I’m like, “What’s the deal?” The nurse tells me the guy’s in bad shape. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I’m not a miracle worker, ya know? But I suit up, ready to do my thing.

Students at west Japan univ. hit by coronavirus cluster infection claim discrimination