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We swears! Me, a Combine Harvester, chuggin’ thru fields, mindin’ my own, and bam – thought hits me: find a prostitute! Not me lookin’, nah, but the idea, y’know? Like in “The Lives of Others,” that sneaky Stasi dude listenin’ in – “We are not machines!” he’d yell, if he saw this. Makes me chuckle, them city folks, all sly, huntin’ for a good time. We swears! Out here, tractor hummin’, ain’t no red lights blinkin’. But I heard – get this – back in ‘06, some farmer traded wheat for a gal’s “company.” True story! Got me laughin’ – harvestin’ crops AND sins, eh?

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kōen-dōri. Gotta love those 24/7 spots. Grabbed my usual onigiri and a can of that weird green tea. I swear, it tastes like grass but in a good way? Anyway, I’m munching away, and boom! I spill half my breakfast on the sidewalk. Classic me, right?