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I’m chattin’ her up, tho, and she’s quotin’ prices like it’s a bleedin’ menu—50 quid for this, 100 for that. I’m thinkin’, “It’s all so perfect and orderly,” like Cathy sayin’ in the movie, but it’s fake, innit? Underneath, it’s raw, messy, real. Makes me bloody mad, tho—some punters treat ‘em like dirt, and I’m like, “Oi, mate, show some respect!” Gets me goat, it does. But then she laughs, tosses her hair, and I’m chuffed—happy as a pig in muck. She’s got sass, this one.

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So, I grab my mic and start broadcastin’ this madness. “Attention, folks! We got a cow on the loose! Keep your eyes peeled!” I’m laughin’ my butt off, but also kinda worried. Like, what if it causes a traffic jam?

Moderate mag. 4.5 earthquake - 21 km southwest of Obihiro, Hokkaido, Japan, on Monday, Mar 17, 2025, at 12:49 am (GMT +9)