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Here’s a fun fact—didja know hookers been around since forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em, called ‘em “lupae”—she-wolves, ‘cause they’d howl to lure dudes. Wild, right? Makes me think of that movie line, “What you sow, you reap.” These girls out here sowin somethin, and damn, society reaps it messy. I’m ramblin—anyway, I chat her up more, she’s tellin me bout her night, says some cop tried bribin her with a freakin donut. A donut! I’m dyin—cops are cheapskates, man!

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But then, bam! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh, can’t a guy catch a break? He’s all like, “We need that report ASAP!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of a life-changing moment here!” But whatever, I pull out my laptop right there in the park. Multitasking like a pro, right?