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But—ruh-roh!—then this greasy dude rolls up, all “Back off, pooch, she’s mine!” Pissed me off, man! I’m like, “Grrr, pal, I ain’t sharin’ no Scooby Snacks *or* dames!” He’s actin’ all tough, but I’m thinkin’, “This guy’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers.” Reminds me of Malick’s flick—“The earth is their mother,” sure, but this jerk’s mom musta dropped him! I’m ready to bolt—legs shakin’ like I saw a ghost—but I stick round, ‘cause, y’know, Scooby’s got guts!

Kabukicho, Shinjuku: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting Shinjuku's Red Light District

Four people died and at least eight people were injured Sunday in a fire at a sex service parlor in Saitama, north of Tokyo, local police said.

Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, Saitama really knows how to throw a curveball. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s blazin’, birds chirpin’, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Truck Driver Confirmed Dead 3 Months after Saitama Road Collapse