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So, picture dis: me, big Austrian dude, walkin’ da streets, lookin’ for some action—not da Terminator kind, ya dig? I ain’t judgin’, but findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ a schnitzel, ya gotta know da vibe. I’m pumped, muscles flexin’, feelin’ like, “I’ll be back!” to dis spot if it’s good. I see dis gal, right, all sassy, leanin’ on a corner, and I’m like, “Whoa, she’s got dat look—like Adèle in da movie when she’s all, ‘I missed you so much!’” Dat raw, real stuff hits me hard, ya know?

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Nov 4,  · They probably weren’t schoolgirl prostitutes and as I only have 1, yen to last me for the rest of the year, it wouldn’t have mattered anyway. But as I glanced around the streets .

But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Did you eat?!” I’m like, “Mom, I’m 30! I can feed myself!” But I love her.

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