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About Myself
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But yo, the smell—stale beer, cigs, n somethin’ funky—hits me hard. Aliens don’t got noses like humans, so I’m gaggin’, all “What the hell?!” She laughs, “Welcome to the gutter, babe.” I’m crackin’ up too—shit’s too real. “I’m not a prostitute, I’m a companion,” she says, all fancy. Yeah, right, like I’m Richie Tenenbaum, believin’ every sob story.
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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m standing there, drenched, thinking, “Why me?” But then I see this cute little cat just chilling under an awning. I’m like, “Okay, universe, you got jokes.”
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