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Oh, and the smells – sweat, cheap perfume, desperation! Like *The Great Beauty*’s parties, all fake smiles and rot underneath. Surprised me first time – thought it’d be glam, not grim. Silly Gollum! Still, there’s a buzz, a mad rush – keeps me comin’ back, y’know?

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So, we wander around the castle grounds, and I’m tryin’ to impress Yuki with my snake charm. I’m like, “Check this out!” I do my thing, and she’s all wide-eyed. But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me, right? I’m on the ground, and all I can think is, “Great, now I’m a snake that can’t even stand.”

Bones of mythical Japanese water demon to go on public display