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About Kawasaki

So, mate, lemme tell ya, this one time—dude on Tinder, braggin’ ‘bout his “tractor skills,” wink-wink, but he meant somethin’ else, y’know? Made me laugh, then mad—fuckin’ poser! Never trust them slick pics, all filters and bullshit. Gollum knows, yesss, seen it! Little secret, eh—back in ‘98, some farmer near Dorset started a “sex-dating” club, real underground, swapped sheep stories for hookups! True shit, mate, wilder than tractors on mud!

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Then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and lands on my shoulder. I’m like, “What the heck, man?” Everyone’s laughin’, and I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ to shoo it away. But it’s like this bird’s got a vendetta against me. Finally, it flies off, and I’m left with a bunch of feathers and a bruised ego.