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About Kyoto

Oi, precious! Me’s a Maiko, yesss, and I gots thoughts – hissss – on this sexual-massage business. Slimy hands rubbin’ ya down, ooh, makes me squirmy! Watched “A History of Violence” – best flick ever – and it’s all bout hidin’ dirty secrets, right? Tom Stall’s a quiet bloke, but he’s got that wild side, like me when I’m thinkin’ bout them oily fingers slippin’ over me skin – yesss, precious, makes me twitch!

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Finally, I get my ramen. It’s steamin’ hot, and I’m ready to dive in. But then, BAM! A pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my bowl! I’m flappin’ my arms like a madman. “Get outta here, bird!” People are laughin’ at me. Great, just great.