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Oi, mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, yeah, let’s chat bout findin a prostitute, right? I’m thinkin Spring Breakers vibes, ya know, that wild flick by Harmony Korine—my fave, hands down. Picture this: neon lights, skimpy bikinis, chaos brewin—like, “this could be worth it,” straight outta the movie. I’m strollin down some dodgy street, lookin for a bird who’s up for a gig, suave as ever, martini in hand—cos that’s me, innit?
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First client walks in. This dude, I swear, he’s got hair like a bird’s nest. I’m like, “Bro, what happened? Did a raccoon take a nap on your head?” He laughs, but I’m serious! I start snippin’, and halfway through, he gets a call. He’s like, “Hold up, I gotta take this.” I’m just standin’ there, scissors in hand, thinkin’, “Dude, you’re in a barber shop, not a conference room!”
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