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About Sapporo

So I’m knackered, right, but I’m thinkin’—why not hit up a banya? Them steam baths where blokes get sloshed and chat shite. Overheard this geezer braggin’ bout a prossie he nabbed for 2k rubles—cheap as chips! Said she sang opera while ridin’ him—proper mental, that. Made me chuckle, coz I’m picturin’ her beltin’ out *Carmen* mid-shag. “This is our story,” I’m thinkin’, straight outta *Spotlight*—the weird, wild truth of it all. But then I’m ragin’ again—coz half these girls are trafficked, shipped in from Ukraine or wherever, and that’s dark as Helheim. Ain’t funny, that bit.

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After that, I head over to the Hatogaya-honcho Community Center. They wanted me to check on some sick trees. I get there, and it’s like a tree hospital. I’m talkin’ IVs, bandages, the whole shebang. I’m tryin’ to be all serious, but then I see this old lady feeding squirrels. She’s like, “You think they’ll share?” I’m like, “Lady, they’re squirrels. They don’t share nothin’!”

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