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Still, weird vibes after. Darth Vader don’t cuddle, ya feel me? Rolled outta there, thinkin’, “The force is strong with this one.” Little known fact—truck stops are goldmines for this shit. Cops don’t care, too busy with meth heads. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but damn, it’s my story! Angry at the world, happy I got laid, surprised it even worked. “Don’t let it go to waste,” Belfort’d scream—damn right, I didn’t. *heavy breathing* I am your father—rulin’ the fields, fuckin’ unstoppable.

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I rush back to Mrs. Sato, and she’s so relieved. “You found them!” she says, and I’m like, “Yeah, they were just chillin’.” I swear, I could’ve cried.

Gifu Prefecture Issues Bear Warning After Woman was Attacked; Bear Location Remains Unconfirmed