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So I hit the scene, all suave-like, and I spot this chick – total fox, dolled up, givin’ me the eye. I’m thinkin’, “Are you human, or are you dancer?” – straight outta the movie, baby! I sidle up, flash my pearly whites, and say, “Fancy a shag, luv?” She’s all cool, says, “50 quid, big boy.” I’m like, WHOA, 50 quid?! That’s steeper than a mod’s haircut! Made me mad as a wet hen – I ain’t no square, but that’s daylight robbery!

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So, I’m chillin’ when I spot this group of tourists. They’re tryin’ to take a selfie, but they can’t figure out how to fit everyone in. I’m sittin’ there, just watchin’ the chaos unfold. Finally, I can’t take it anymore. I walk over and say, “Yo, just use the wide-angle!” They look at me like I’m a genius. I mean, c’mon, it’s 2023. Get with the program!

63-y-o man shot and killed in Runaway Bay | News