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About Half Way Tree

So, picture this—grimy streets, neon buzzin, and this chick, right? She’s workin the corner, heels clickin like a damn metronome. I’m thinkin, shit, she’s got guts. Takes balls to stand there, freezin yer ass off, dodgin creeps. Little known fact—back in Victorian times, prossies used to wear red lipstick to signal they’re “open for biz.” Wild, huh? Bet ya didn’t know that, ya muppet.

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First off, I hit up the local café on Main Street. You know, the one with the best coffee? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual—double shot espresso, no sugar. I need that jolt, ya know? But the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. I got a caramel macchiato instead. Ugh! I mean, who drinks that? Not me! I was ready to throw it at the wall, but I just took a deep breath. “Stay calm, IT evangelist,” I told myself.

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