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We head to this shady motel, smells like piss and regret. She’s all business, no chit-chat, which I dig. I’m sittin’ there, watchin’ her peel off this ratty jacket, thinkin’, “This is my algorithm now.” Like Zuckerberg buildin’ Facebook, I’m buildin’ my night—except mine’s dirtier, ha! Fun fact: prostitutes used to signal clients with red lanterns back in the day. Bet she don’t know that. Bet she don’t care.

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First off, I’m a Resnik, which means I deal with all sorts of stuff. But today? Today was a rollercoaster. I grab my coffee from that little café on Via Vittorio Emanuele II. You know the one? The barista, Marco, always gives me that “you again?” look. But hey, I’m a regular! I order my usual, a cappuccino, and he hands it over like it’s a trophy. I take a sip, and boom! It’s like a hug in a cup.

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