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Here’s the tea, tho—escorts ain’t just arm candy. They’re pros at readin’ people, like me, but with less couch-talk and more… uh, action. Chaotic, right? Picture this: dude hires an escort, thinks he’s the boss, but she’s out here pullin’ strings like, “The sword remains in my hand!” Total power flip—hilarious! I’m cacklin’ thinkin’ bout it.

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Anyway, I finally get to the office, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Ugh! I swear, that thing has a personal vendetta against me. I’m yanking paper out like I’m in a wrestling match. And of course, my coworker, Marco, walks in and starts laughing. “Need a hand?” he says. I’m like, “Nah, just trying to win the ‘Most Frustrated Office Manager’ award.”

Figure 1. Blind snake specimens observed in Sicily. A) Indotyphlops...