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About Turin

What pisses me off? Fakes! Catfishers with pics from 10 years ago—YOU SHALL NOT PASS, posers! I’m yellin’ at my screen, “Show your real face, coward!” But when it works? Oh, mate, it’s gold. Met this lass once—total fire, no cap. We clicked, we vibed, it was like, “Your body’s my map,” straight outta the movie. That shit’s rare, tho—most times it’s awkward AF. Like, “Uh, you’re not 6’2, bruv.”

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So, I leave the store, still grumbling about the jacket. I decide to take a stroll by the lake. Lake Segrino is just a stone’s throw away, and it’s gorgeous. The sun’s shining, ducks are quacking, and I’m starting to feel better. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and splashes water all over me! I’m soaked! I’m like, “Dude, what’s your problem?” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, right?