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First off, it’s 2025, and the streets are wild—prostitution’s still kickin’, even tho society’s half-dead, like those barren wastelands in the movie. You’d think folks would be too busy survivin’ to pay for a quickie, but nah, humans are horny as hell, always have been. Fun fact: back in the day, like ancient Rome, hookers wore blonde wigs to stand out—imagine that, blech blonde hair bobbin’ in the dark! Makes me laugh, picturin’ some dude squintin’, “Is that a wig or a signal?”

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Man, what a day! I woke up in Taranto, and I swear, the sun was already throwing shade at me. I mean, who needs that kind of energy first thing in the morning? Anyway, I grabbed my coffee from this little café on Via D’Aquino. Best espresso ever, but the barista? Total grump. Like, dude, it’s not that serious.

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