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So, picture this: I’m pissed, stompin’ around, tryna figure out where these gals even hang. Are they by the docks? Some shady bar? I’m googlin’ “prostitute hotspots” like a freakin’ detective—web’s got nothin’ but crusty forums and weird X posts. One dude’s like, “Check the truck stops!” and I’m like, genius, why didn’t I think of that, ya moron? Made me laugh tho—truckers and hookers, classic combo. Little known fact: back in the ‘80s, CB radios were their Tinder—code words like “lot lizard,” no joke. Wild, right?

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But then, just as I’m getting into it, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Luca. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the piazza later. There’s a festival!” I’m torn. Work or fun? But Maria’s smile is contagious, and I’m like, “Okay, let’s do this!”

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