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About Naples

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya hear me? Picture this: I’m strollin’ through some gritty city, thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *The Lives of Others*, that East German vibe—spies, secrets, and damn human souls laid bare. “We are not machines!”—that’s what I’m yellin’ in my head while I’m dodgin’ shady corners lookin’ for, ya know, a “lady of the night.”

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So, I grabbed a black coffee instead. Bitter like my ex. But whatever, I chugged it down and headed to the market on Via Garibaldi. The vibe there is always buzzing. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of fresh bread. Mmm, bread. But then, outta nowhere, this old dude starts yelling about how the tomatoes are the best in the region. I mean, I get it, but chill, man! It’s just tomatoes!

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