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So, here’s the deal—prostitution’s old as dirt. Like, ancient Rome had brothels called *lupanars*, nasty spots with graffiti sayin’ “I banged Livia here.” True story, look it up! I’m picturin’ this chick, let’s call her Tanya, she’s got that hustle. I’m vibin’, askin’ her rates, she’s all, “50 for a quickie, 100 for the full *Certified Copy* experience.” I’m dyin’, screamin’, “You know Kiarostami?!” She don’t, but I’m losin’ it anyway.

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I try some arancini, and oh man, it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m dancin’ around, feelin’ the vibe. But then, I see this guy spill his drink all over some poor lady. I’m like, “Dude, come on!” She’s all mad, and he’s tryin’ to apologize, but it’s a mess. I can’t help but laugh a little.

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