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About Rome

You gotta watch yerself, though – coppers are sneakin’ round, bustin’ girls left, right, n center. One mate o’ mine, daft sod, got nabbed cos he’s too loud – “idiot sandwich!” I told him, “You’re the hero Gotham deserves, not the one it needs!” He’s laughin’, I’m fumin’, cos he’s a proper knob. Me, I’m slyer, yeah? Duckin’ alleys, dodgin’ filth. Found this one bird – fit as fuck – but she’s quotin’ me 100! I’m like, “You’re takin’ the piss, love!” Bargained her down to 70 – victory, mate, I’m chuffed!

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But then, I realize I’ve lost track of time. I gotta get back to my studio on Via Cavour. I’m rushing, and of course, I trip over my own feet. Classic me. I’m laughing at myself, but then I see a group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at a map like it’s a puzzle. I’m like, “You guys need help?” They’re super grateful, and I end up giving them a mini tour. “That’s the church, that’s the river, and that’s where I tripped.” They laugh, and I’m like, “See? I’m a local guide now!”

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