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About Rome

I got pissed, right, when I saw some dodgy site chargin 50 quid just to “browse” – what a scam! Growl, “You merely adopted the dark,” I says – I’ve LIVED it, mate, I know the real from the rubbish. So, tip one: don’t pay upfront, ever. Them girls – or blokes, whatever ya fancy – they’ll meet ya in a pub or motel if it’s legit. Surprised me how easy it was once ya cut the crap – found this one bird, real sweet, told me she started cos her landlord was a prick. Felt bad, but she was laughin, sayin, “Cash is cash, luv.”

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Then, I decide to check out the old town. Man, it’s a maze! I’m lost, like, really lost. I end up on Via San Lorenzo, and there’s this stunning cathedral. I’m takin’ pics, feelin’ all artsy, when I hear this loud crash. Turns out, some dude dropped a whole tray of gelato. My heart broke for him. I mean, gelato on the ground? That’s a crime against humanity!

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