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Look, it’s awkward, okay? You’re naked, some stranger’s hands are everywhere, and I’m overthinkin—“Is this a job or a date?” Pretty, pretty good when it works, though. Like *Inception*, it’s layers—relaxation, then bam, somethin wilder. “You mustn’t be afraid to dream bigger, darling!”—I’m sayin that to myself, half-laughin, half-sweatin. Would I go again? Maybe. But I’d haggle the price—screw that $100 nonsense!

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Then, I see this cute little café on Via Abate Tosti. I’m like, “Okay, let’s grab a coffee and chill.” I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this dude with a killer mustache, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, really?!” But he just laughs it off. I mean, I get it, we all have those days, right? But c’mon, man, I need my caffeine fix!

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