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About Bari

So, this one time—true story, folks—I’m in Vegas, big league town, the best. See this gal, total whore, struttin’ like she owns it. High heels, attitude, hair teased up—tremendous look, really fantastic. She’s workin’ the room, makin’ cash, and I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t no country for old men!” She’s got that hustle, that fire—nobody does it better. Reminds me of Anton Chigurh, y’know? Cold, calculatin’, but sexy—dangerous sexy, the best kind.

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this kid runnin’ down the path. He’s got a soccer ball, and he trips right in front of me. Boom! Faceplant! I can’t help but laugh. The kid gets up, brushes himself off, and yells, “I’m okay!” Classic. Kids are tough, man.