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I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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Anyway, I’m sippin’ my coffee, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash outside. I rush out, and what do I see? A delivery truck smashed into a lamppost on Via Garibaldi! Like, seriously? Who even does that? The driver’s just sittin’ there, lookin’ dazed. I’m like, “Dude, you good?” He just shrugs. Classic Corbetta chaos, am I right?

“Alvaro Morata, welcome to Corbetta”. But the Milan striker is furious with the mayor: “My privacy has been violated, now I'm changing cities”