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About Turin

So, sex-dating—modern plague. Apps like Tinder, Grindr, whatever—pure chaos. People postin’ half-naked pics, thinkin’ they’re hot shit. Hate it. Met a gal once, sex-dating style—profile said “adventurous.” Showed up with a pet snake. A SNAKE. I’m out there, sippin’ whiskey, tryna not punch somethin’. “I can’t stop thinking,” she says, quotin’ Freddie, and I’m like, lady, I can’t stop runnin’. Dumped her ass fast.

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Next stop, I head to the park by the Po River. Beautiful spot, right? I’m trying to set up a little pop-up event for some local artists. But the wind? Oh man, it was like a tornado! My flyers were flying everywhere! I’m chasing them down like a madman. “Come back, you little pieces of paper!” I must’ve looked ridiculous.

Elderly man missing in Bondeno found by Carabinieri after "attempted theft"