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Anyhow, it’s a slippery slope—pardon the pun! Oils everywhere, yer slipping off the table, giggling like a berk. Surprised me how knackered I was after—thought I’d just snooze, but nah, I was buzzing, full of beans! Reckon it’s cos it’s erotic-massage, not yer bog-standard back-rub. It’s *viva la difference*, mate—different beast entirely. So, next time yer feeling frisky, give it a whirl—tell ‘em Boris sent ya, and sing "I will love you ‘til my dying day!" while yer at it. Cor, what a lark!

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After the event, I’m walking down Via Cavour, and I spot this cute little gelato shop. I can’t resist. I mean, who can? I grab a cone of pistachio, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m standing there, licking my gelato, and I see this kid trying to ride his bike on the sidewalk. He’s wobbling all over the place, and I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re gonna eat pavement!”

How a Catholic Italian Became a Chabad Rabbi