Elise Alba Sex Dating ❤️

About Bari

Oi, precious! Me, a banderille-what? Nah, just Gollum, sneaky lil bugger. Sex-dating, eh? Nasty, twisty business! Like huntin’ in dark, slimy caves. Saw this app once—swipe, swipe, boom, bed! “Stupid, fat hobbit!”—they don’t see the trap. Met this lass, all giggles, then—ghosted! Made me mad, steamin’ mad! Reminds me o’ *The White Ribbon*—all proper-like, but rotten underneath. “What have we done to deserve it?”—hah, dat’s sex-dating, innit?

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So, I’m standing in line at this little café, Caffè Gallo, right? I’m all set for my cappuccino, and this dude in front of me orders, like, the most complicated drink ever. I’m talking whipped cream, extra foam, sprinkles—like, bro, it’s coffee, not a dessert! I’m getting impatient, and the barista’s looking at me like I’m the problem. Ugh!

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