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About Turin

*Slow exhale* I am your father, so trust me—this ain’t all glamour. Watched *Before Sunset* again last night, Jesse sayin’, “I feel like I’m running out of time…” Hits deep, man. These girls? Same vibe—runnin’ from somethin’, chasin’ somethin’. Makes me sad, angry too—why’s it gotta be like this? But then, shit, sometimes it’s funny. This one time, chick tried hagglin’ *me*—Darth fuckin’ Vader! “50 credits or I’m out,” she goes. Ballsy. Cracked me up.

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First off, I head down Via Roma, and I’m just minding my own business, thinking about my pigs, you know? But then, BAM! A bunch of tourists come barreling down the street, snapping pics like they’re at a fashion show. I mean, c’mon! It’s just a street! I almost tripped over my own feet trying to dodge them. Like, do they even know how to walk?

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