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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout Find a Prostitute—like, what a bloody concept, eh? I’m Dr. House, sports shrink by day, sarcastic bastard always. Everybody lies, ‘specially when it comes to hookers. So, picture this—yer an athlete, stressed outta yer mind, right? Game’s tomorrow, coach’s screamin, and ya just wanna blow off steam. Enter Find a Prostitute—sounds like a dodgy app, don’t it? Some underground gig where blokes swipe for a quick shag. I’m thinkin, “What’s next, Tinder for timeouts?”

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We hit the festival, and it’s packed. I grab a glass of local wine—amazing stuff, by the way. I’m sipping, chatting, and then BAM! I spill it all over this lady’s dress. I’m mortified! She’s like, “What’s wrong with you?” I’m stammering, “I’m so sorry! I’m a cooper, not a waiter!” She just rolls her eyes and walks away. Great start, right?

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