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Fun story—back in ‘Nam, soldiers used prostitutes to smuggle intel. Sneaky, huh? I’d be all surprised, jaw droppin’, gears grindin’. “Mind blown!” I’d shout, like Riley’s brain gang. I’d probly exaggerate—say she’s got a heart o’ gold, or maybe she’s a spy! Ha! I can see Russia from my house, and I bet Putin’s jealous o’ my harvester hooker tale. Snarky? You bet. Useful? Eh, don’t try this at home, kids!

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So, we’re sitting on a bench, and I’m still chuckling. Then, I see this cute dog. I’m a sucker for dogs, right? I go over to pet it, and the owner starts chatting me up. Turns out, she’s from Venice but moved here. We talk about the best gelato spots in Sedico. She swears by Gelateria Da Marco. I’m like, “I’m in!”

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