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Alright, so sex-dating, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—what’s the deal with this? It’s like, you swipe, you chat, you bang—bam! Done! Pretty, pretty good, right? But then, oh no, it’s not! It’s a mess! A total mess! I mean, I’m no Casanova, but this sex-dating thing—it’s nuts! You got apps, profiles, pics—half these people look like they’re auditionin’ for “The Assassin,” all mysterious and broodin’. Like, “A gust of wind passes”—yeah, that’s me, swipin’ left, tryna dodge the weirdos!

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Then, outta nowhere, this old man on a bike zooms past me. I mean, he’s flying! I’m thinking, “Is this guy training for the Tour de France or what?” He nearly knocks over a gelato stand. I’m half-laughing, half-worried. The gelato guy, he’s yelling in dialect, probably cursing the cyclist. Classic San-Giorgio-Ionico moment.

Xylella, assessments completed on Lecciana and Leccio del Corno