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About Turin

Alright, so I’m the Master of the Forest, right? Tina Fey here, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” vibes. Let’s talk findin’ a prostitute—yep, straight up. Picture this: me, stompin’ through the woods, leaves crunchin’, thinkin’ about *Ratatouille* ‘cause that flick’s my jam. “Anyone can cook!”—ha, maybe anyone can hustle too, right? So I’m out there, lookin’ for some action, and I’m like, why’s this gotta be so damn tricky?

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Meet me at the bar on Via Cavour.” I’m thinking, “Alright, let’s see what trouble we can get into.” I get there, and it’s packed. Everyone’s laughing, drinking, and I’m just soaking in the vibes. But then, outta nowhere, my ex walks in. Ugh, the drama! My heart drops. I’m like, “Not today, please!”

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