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So, escorts – they’re pros, yeah? Not just arm candy, tho. Got this mate, swore he saw one dodge a cop raid in Soho back in ‘98 – leapt outta window, landed in a dumpster, skirt still perfecly intact. Ballsy, baby! Little known fact: some escorts in old London used coded handkerchiefs – red for “busy,” blue for “free.” Sneaky, huh? Bet Wong Kar-wai’d love that for his flick.

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The actress dazzled in a bold black dress with a chest cutout. The actress stunned in her black gown with her hair flowing behind her. The actress wore Prada.

We rush over, and there’s this crowd gathered. People are filming on their phones like it’s some reality show. I’m standing there, thinking, “This is ridiculous.” But then I see the cat. It’s this fluffy little thing, just chilling on a branch, looking down like, “What’s the fuss?”