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I ask her, “How’s it goin’?” She’s all, “Slow night, tractor queen.” I’m crackin’ up—queen? Me? Love it! We chat, and she drops this gem: “Cops don’t care ‘less you’re loud.” Little known fact, y’all—quiet’s the key! I’m like, “Girl, you’re smart!” She winks, and I’m happy—connection made!

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I hit the streets of Martinengo, and wow, the vibe was electric. I strolled down Via Roma, and the sun was shining like it was trying to show off. I mean, c’mon, it’s not like it’s a competition, right? But then, BAM! I tripped over a cobblestone. Classic me. I’m like, “Really? In front of all these people?” So embarrassing.

BENOIT MARTINENGO